No Good for Me
by dahoughtonuk
Summary: Here we have Cordelia's viewpoints on certain things that happen in season one and two.


No Good for Me.  
--

It just isn't fair. The gap is far too wide. Luckily my companions are so shallow they fail to notice exactly who I'm attacking. Still I have a fantasy. I wonder if he'll ever notice my interest. Not likely with that pretty girl fawning over him. I just wonder does he know? And even if he did, he wouldn't want to go out with me. It's just not fair. He's hugging her again. I just wonder exactly what they're talking about.

They have a secret. Conspiracy's are cool. I want to find out what these out about. NO it is not my fault they won't tell me anything. Here he is.

"Cordy, your hair..." he says.

Oh god, what's wrong with it. I can't let him see me like this. He has.  
What is happening here? Here I am Miss Popular and I'm fawning over this loser. Must escape. No time for insults.

"There you go, Willow, I got rid of her. What's the matter?"

"Nothing," I hear her lie. She knows. She knows. This is not good. Not good at all. He of course believes her. On the positive side he might not know about her crush but can I really risk it? No I can't.  
--

He's interviewing me on the mysterious murder of a girl. This is so great. No barbs, okay a few but we're talking like friends. This is not what I want. Well it is, but I want more. Much more. The talent show. I have to enter, Xander however doesn't. Anyway I doubt his talents would be any good in a show. Pity, if he entered the show with a good talent I could ask him to the dance. Then Xander shocks me. Typical of Principal Snyder. Ordering people with no public talent to do something. I just wish wild dogs hadn't eaten the last one.

Next week instead of Xander turning up, Buffy does. What a disappointment. On the other hand he probably made a sensible decision. After all I wouldn't want him hurt. Not that I'd ever admit it to his face. I'm so relieved when Willow asks me to join them for lunch. I am so relieved, it means she doesn't know. I am about to ask when my official boyfriend invites me to give them the brushoff. I do then I hear Xander say seriously. "Where's an invisble girl when you need one?"

I must remember attacking Willow verbally is counterproductive. Xander's going to leap to her defence since she's his best friend. Well I'd better not do it when he's in earshot anyway.

Great, I need Willows help. Setting up for the final prom. I start talking about Mitch and drift into fantasy. Fortunatley she doesn't cotton on despite the fact I'm talking about Xander's behaviour. Then something happens. A huge pile of dead bodys. After we've both screamed for a while, Willow does something strange. She starts driving stakes through each ones heart. I'm not dumb - Vampires. They slay vampires. Xander is cool. But unfortunatly he can't admit to being, Secondly all gorgeous guys are taken. I need someone who has cool clothes.

Able to look cool, not be cool enough to be asked out? - answer Xander. Oh well. Time to visit the library. Still with a quick makeover he could win the floor and help me keep the popularity up. As a side benefit his popularity might increase - and his luck with girls. I shiver at the thought. Of course my luck was the usual dreadful. Where was Xander? Off rescuing Buffy. Maybe he's right about it being Karma.

-  
Why couldn't I say directly what I wanted to. Too proud. Three Musketeers yes it was a poor insult, but people usually include D'Artangnan who didn't become one until after the others had left. Xander said three stooges, would be a better insult. Buffy agreed with three stooges. Implying me Xander and Willow. Then called me a moron. Xander rescued us while Buffy and Angel protected him. Us being Willow, Mr Giles, Miss Calender, and most importantly me. The next bit was rescuing me from being chopped up. Say what you like he is certainly resourceful. He lay on top of me.  
What was really annoying was that it was as Xander said "Nothing Personal" I then made the widest pass at him that I dared and he took me literally, so next Saturday there I was sharpening stakes.

That is so typical of Xander. He's totally clueless. I offer him _any_ service he desires, and what does he do? He has me sharpening stakes.

Sharpening stakes, when we could be dating. That's why I made the crack, Xander missed it, as usual. Still this is the guy who doesn't realise his best friend, Willow, has been in love with him for how long? I should be glad about that. Yes, Willow's nice, but she's _too_ nice. To make things even worse Willow and I ended up trapped in the same cupboard. Willow my main rival. Why couldn't it be Xander? But Oh No, it's got to be Willow.

Okay I'll have to move on. Or at least try to. I have to face it. Xander's just a fantasy, one that's no good for me.


End file.
